365 Days of Courage #45: Embrace your Onlyness
Happy Valentine's Day!
This is my love letter to you. My ode to your onlyness, as t'were.
I've written about "onlyness" before and talk about it - incessantly sometimes - with my clients. Just yesterday, I was talking to someone for the very first time and onlyness snuck into the conversation.
I'm obsessed with "onlyness". Madly, truly, deeply obsessed. Like reading Anne Lamott obsessed. Or watching Idris Elba obsessed. Or listening to Curtis Stigers and his band in a New York jazz club obsessed. Or discovering Law and Order twenty years ago when I moved to New York obsessed.
Onlyness feels to me like the answer to everything. Wherever there is a disconnect in your life or business, I'm convinced that it is because you are disconnected from your onlyness. You're trying to imitate someone else's onlyness instead of embracing your own.
In case I haven't already regaled you with tales of onlyness, here is the definition of "onlyness" by Nilofer Merchant, who coined the phrase.
Can I hear an Amen for the meanderings that brought us to this very moment in our lives?
The meanderings that made no sense as we meandered and yet which now - as we reflect back on our lives - create a pattern that informs and highlights the work we now want to do in the world or the people we want to spend time with or the problems that we yearn to solve.
In an interview with Nilofer Merchant, my business mentor Tara Gentile asked her to say more about what "onlyness" is. Nilofer responded:
So today I want you to embrace your one and onlyness. Trust it. Respect it. Buy it flowers and its very favorite dark chocolate. Toast it with a bottle of something perfectly chilled.
Honor your onlyness by putting it to good use in your life and in your business.
Here's to you and "all your experiences, hopes, dreams, achievements, setbacks, meanderings and accidents of birth."
Click here to learn more about Nilofer’s book: The Power of Onlyness: Make Your Wild Ideas Mighty Enough to Dent the World